Rants & Raves

Why do I get the feeling I am the only webdesigner-slash-writer who isn't capable of "inventing" a friggin layout for my own journal-slash-blog-slash-crap? My fingers are itching for a layout. In a couple of weeks, (well, 2 weeks approximately if not exact) I'll be turning eighteen. And still, I do not have a goddamn layout. Merde.merde.merde. God works in mysterious ways. I hope, i wish, i pray, I would get my laptop.

It is still raining outside however, I am still procrastinating (by writing nonsense) instead of researching for my Drug Study, which is composed of a gazillion drugs I'm supposed to memorize by tomorrow. So anyway, as I started saying earlier, I will be turning eighteen, I still do not have a life. My aunt called me up out of the blue to tell me that I'm actually going to have a debut. My jaw dropped. Literally. How in Mrs. Smith's pantyshorts am I going to come up with party ideas in two weeks. Plus I have a whole bunch of workload that wouldn't even fit my schedule. Minus more sleep hours for me then. Well, I managed to draw up a list of people that would hopefully come. I dunno. Sixty. seventy. tops. I don't even feel like partying. I had wanted to hear bands at my so-called party. Well, I guess things would be different. Note to self: Hire party people and put party plan into action.

I slept the whole day after duty yesterday. Was too lazy to get up to buy groceries with Irish. Chris, my supposed "other-half", was supposed to come but didn't. I don't know what is up with guys these days. They ditch you, for countless hours of playing computer games, which I really wouldn't mind if it were me playing. I'd looooooooove to get my hands on my computer, but noooo, it's halfway across the gulf. But at least it's fine, he called me up just to tell me. Too bored to get up anyway. Irish had to convince me that I do not have junkfood stash to make me get up. Again, I had to drag my butt all the way to RP with Irish, and we were running like hell in the middle of Pedro Gil; we both are such ditzes when crossing the street...

Just another wildcard Wednesday

Wednesday saw a dark cloud above my head as I groggily dragged myself up from my bed this morning. I hate Wednesdays. (I hate weekdays, go figure!) It was raining so friggin hard at 3 in the morning as we had to go to duty at PCH. Day 4 of my mind-boggling internship as SN.(Yeah!) Baby Girl Alcolicol was my patient for 3 days straight and I can't bear to see her still stuck to tubes and all that. At least they weren't making me inject her with more Phenobarbitol as she's still sedated. Her vital signs were checked every 2 hours and while everyone is busy at the delivery room frantically waiting for newborn babies to be delivered, all I ever do at the Nursery ICU unit was to stare at the ceiling of that creepy, tiny 4-walled room. So much for my attention span. Still, the Alcolicol chick ain't moving. Merde.

Oh, and didn't I mention that they cancelled our classes due to the floods in Pedro Gil. Already a little too late for announcements, isn't it? Our duty got cancelled the last minute, so we had to pack up, change out of our really, really, really gureeeenn scrubsuit and head home. At least I get to sleep 'till later...

Mom called me up yesterday. I missed her so badly. I told her I was busy studying, not daydreaming of bass guitar players who don't give me the time of day. Which guy in his right mind would? I am a freak. They prolly think I would gobble them up just by looking at them. Anyway, I was telling mom about my cases, patients and stuff, and still no reaction from her. She was afterall, a nurse herself. She would want me to become a surgeon, but I ought to be specialized in Pediatrics. Sometimes people can be control freaks without even meaning to.

It's nice to blog again, even if there aren't many audience to read the pathetic stuff I put here from time to time. It would be nice to revamp the site though, I just didn't like it if people had the same color scheme as mine. Creativity. creativity. tsk, tsk.

Today wasn't that bad. I'm actually looking forward the rest of this Wednesday. :)

My Dog, Arf Arf

Oh happy daze. (oh happy daze).. When Jesus washed. (when Jesus washed). When Jesus washed (when Jee-sus washed). Washed my sins away (washed my sins away). I am the background vocalist of my own voice. This is how pathetic I am when I'm dazed, bored, or just in a loony bin. Heheeh, sigh. The Nicole's Day-in-a-life-of-a-nurse Chronicles will begin shortly. I'm uber-duper excited to play Nurse.harhar. Nothing much to say as usual.

Marcussy will always be Marcus, with her pet-tortol searching escapades. There's like this store at Robplace that sells cute fishies and animols. I so love the word "tortol"! We were thinking of unusual names for pets during our Human Anat. lecture, when we weren't paying that much attention to Dr. Solano's quips. Zeehbazsheouz Gluhnds. Ffseudo Hustratehfayhd Effiethehlial Cehls. Harhar. So anyway, if I'm ever gonna get a doggie, (which prolly won't happen, ever) I'm gonna name it, "arf arf". I know, how dumb. Watever.

Was singing Penny& Me for the nth time this week. Everyone is always associating me with the song. They're like, "Oh, it's Nicole's Song Syndrome na!" I think Beanchi's already getting sawa. More ramblings tomorrow. I must get this song thingy out of my system.

Cheerio!

Bestie-less & Boyfriendless

The
How-was-my-day diary entry....

I don't have a bestie. I am boyfriendless. I hate friendster. Started deleting friends as a hobby. I don't feel like blogging any day now. UAAP is just an excuse to oggle at boys I don't even know. I failed a couple of my quizzes and LTs these past few weeks. I've had two needles the size of toothpicks puncturing my arms (I yelped,still I survived) My pathetic excuse for learning is reading friggin' cosmo paperbacks my roommates have on their shelves. I have a whole day of paper, delayed exams, no-prof-30-minute-in-between periods thats why I have my butt stuck to the nearest computer chair at the computer lab. Sigh.

To sum it all up, life sucks.
I need to take a breather.
God, I'm so wordy.

Filipino 101

Nicole's bagong philosophy para sa bagong buhay:

Ang friendster ay isang kagaguhan...

Ang sagot ni Marcus:

So much....


Wala lang. I'm not myself today...


-Nicole Aleja Reyes Maramo, SN (Student Nurse, potah!)


*sigh...as if you people are reading this....

Real

I realized that you can't always get what you want, no matter how much you want it so badly. I guess I realized it today. Maybe there are some things that are not really for me. Like living alone. I don't know. One thing's for sure- things will change for me this year. I can tell. I really do.

California, california!

This summer vacation is supposed to be a good idea. So why, why, why am I stuck in my uncle's cozy estate with nothing to do but scarf down packets of m&m's and be online 24/7. Getting stuck in front of the pc is starting to give me a migraine.

Today, I got the hang of being the babysitter to 6 month old Caitlin. She is such an angel when she doesn't scream at my ears. I've been carrying her every once in a while, whenever I'm actually of the computer. Trivia on IRC, #asiana can get pretty addictive. Earlier, I've had some strangest conversations with the weirdest people online. Here's a recap of some of my interesting convos:

cool`dud: hi
me: don't ask for my asl because it's boring
cool`dud: oh k. have pic?
cool`dud: friendster?
me: no. i do not have friendster (liar, hahah) i don't show my pics online for public consumption/corruption
cool`dud: ah i see
cool`dud: taray...
me: yeah you got that right
me: see yea

[no such nick]

Well, it's not that interesting as I am being sarcastic all the time. What is up with the ASL/Have pic?? It's just too damn annoying. Why can't two people just have a plain darn interesting conversation then exchange contact numbers afterwards. I mean that just spoils the whole thing if you guys would just exchange numbers in the first place. Some people, excluding me, probably just want to do it for the heck of it. Hahah, like Britney's shotgun wedding. Hehehe. Or sometimes when I just can't recall the person I'm chatting with, I tell him I have STML...Short term memory loss. I just get the kick out of that one...hehehe

Did i mention that somewhere on the other side of the planet, some guy thinks I'm a Jew for the reason that I actually sound like one? Duh. I mentioned and told him that Larry King was a Jew. Now he's claiming that I sound like him. Go figure. So much for IRC

I fell on the showers today leaving my left knee throbbing with pain as I've gotten a prune-like bruise on my left thigh. I swear, I am not taking a bath ever...heheh. I can't walk properly now and I'm hobbling my way to the computer. Well, at least I'm not in crutches.

Veejay is bugging me again...heheh, I wouldn't mind talking on the phone with an old pal, but everytime I answer the phone I hear the words 'loser' and ' i do not care' all the time.. Well, since I love to piss people of as much as he did, I would talk to him and say stupid things. He teases me a lot. Sometimes, it annoyed me. Hell, it's all good. I've gotta sleep now. I've had seven hours of sleep the whole day and I think I'm getting cranky.

This is so not my day. Damn.

She will definitely be loved

She Will Be Loved Lyrics by Maroon 05


Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Nothing, really

I haven't been updating a lot. No, not busy. Just lacking resources...like a computer...hehehe. Damn. I'm going to L.A. this Friday. Coolness :) :)

2004

Loved this song back in highschool, me and my bestfriend used to joke about it as the 'sex' song in American Pie. This is really nice and yes, it made me cry. I'm no longer in my Carrie Bradshaw-ish voice now. It's 2004. Time to get high..time to stay real....

Oh yea...Incubus is comin'..can't wait!!

Good Morning Baby by Bic Runga and Dan Wilson of Semisonic

Between an overload of information
And a striving for a pure dedication I
Find myself looking for the exit sign
See your pretty face in the sunshine
In the morning after staying up all night I
Want to wake you just to hear you
Tell me it's alright
And all I want to be is too much
Sometimes for me
Good morning baby
I hope I'm gonna make it through another day
Good morning baby
I hope I'm gonna make it through another day
See the stars and all the planets
Fly the great wide world and have it all
Yeah better get a ticket better get in line
I'm praying now for beautiful weather
Take a car and drive forever but I'm
Only ever sitting at the traffic light
And all the world to see is too much
Sometimes for me
Good morning baby
I hope I'm gonna make it through another day
Good morning baby
I hope we're gonna make it through another day
(And when you rise)
And when you rise you'll find me here
(Open your eyes)
And see myself reflected there
(And for awhile)
A little room becomes an everywhere

I wish I were fearless. I don't have to crawl under the covers at night or ignore people who are ranting obnoxiously. But then again, I'd feel bad if I bloodied a nose of some idiot who'd think I'm the biggest loser in the entire planet. Just a thought.

How come you don't have a boyfriend, Nicole?
Nicole Maramo's fast track answers to that sarcastic-toned line. Think fast!

1. The Arrogant Approach
"Boyfriend? I don't date boys. I date men."

2. The "I love my independence" Approach

"All men I date keep asking me to marry them and I'm just not ready to commit."

3. The Confident Approach
"I'm already engaged to someone. Only he doesn't know it yet."

4. The "I've watched too many gangster movies Approach
"Why don't I have a boyfriend? Why don't you have a life? Haven't you
got anything better to do with your time than to ask me stupid
questions? Now get out of my face before I really lose my temper."

5. The Clueless Approach
"A boyfriend? Omigod, Is that like a Girl Scout??"

6. The "danger-lover" Approach
"I only like dating cold-blooded criminals and all the best ones are
behind bars."

7. The Flirtatious Approach
"I don't have a boyfriend because I'm saving myself for you." *okay this does not work for me*

8. The Wounded Approach
"Stare off sadly into the distance with teary eyes; feign a lump in your
throat and say, "I did love someone once . . ."
(This will embarrass the questioner, who will then leave you alone.)

9. The Mysterious Approach
Lower your voice to whisper and say, "I'm romantically involved with a
very important person and our relationship is top-secret. If I told you
who he was, something terrible might happen to me."
(This will worry the questioner who will then leave you alone.)

10. The Lunatic Approach
Begin to laugh hysterically, stop suddenly and then stare directly at
the questioner while saying nothing. (This will frighten the questioner
who will not only leave you alone, he or she will never speak to you
again.)

My approach, I'd rather get a dog than be painstakingly sweet, I'd rather drive my car than hail a cab with him, I'd rather read a book than spend my time with a guy who would rip my heart out and place it in a doggy bag. Hehehe, call me a meanie, but boyfriends are a waste of time.

Millions of girls are sooooo into the, 'honeysweetiescooterpiemarshmallowswithsugarontop kinda love', well you know what? That sucks. Oh sure, I'd openly receive comments and cat calls from you ego-bruised men who would prolly judge and condemn me, rather than to get to know me. I don't care. I'm not a wannabe and I'm definitely not anti-male. So be shaken, not stirred.

Where is my mind? Maybe elsewhere- or just floating nearby. I'm currently intoxicated and still hearing the familiar riffs of 'Mariposa' by Sugarfree played live. Last night has got to be the best night ever. John, Angel, Ian and I decked out in our normal and most human clothes ever, were at the NuRock Awards. I never was a rocker. Or at least I pretended to be one, just by swaying my hips and jumping up and down. Rico Blanco rocks! Well, everybody rocks. heheh. So, where exactly is my mind? Going..going, gone.

Currently reading: Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom. An old man, a young man and life's greatest lesson. It's all good. Blog later- have to catch my next class...

Nicole's friendster profile....

Nicole, people call her Nicky; a soon-to-be-
eighteen, delusional, quirky,enigmatic 17 year old; 5 feet
six;
large brown
eyes; with tangled, lemon scented hair; eldest among four
brothers; only girl; unica ija of my dad; just your
average teenager; plain jane;
eccentric; weird; sarcastic; happy-go-lucky; cynical;
opinionated; straightforward; I’ll-tell-you-if-i-don’t-
like-
you type of girl; could be perky when you tell her; too
aesthetic; religious by nature; typical gung-ho person;
natural born procrastinator; funny when pissed; have very
intense moodswings; aspiring web designer; thinks she’s
supergirl; t.v. and internet junkie; has the ability to
drive you insane; thinks that Tibet should be freed;
believes that being talented takes whole a lot of skill;
loves hot fudge sundaes; loves the
color
pink; ‘taray’ streaked; could live with burger king and
lots of fries; rants whenever she feels like it; just
another face in the crowd; a constant daydreamer; hates
being the center of attention; perfectionist; likes rainy
days; feels overwhelmed when some anonymous admirer sends
her orange flowers; pissed when people misspell
her name; hates people who say things that don’t make
sense; forgives people for no apparent reason ( well, the
guy thwacked you in the back); says ‘uh-huh’ and ‘no way!’
all the time; has very vivid
imagination; reads
paperbacks; wishes she were fearless; prefers to be locked
up in her room; tries on a million different clothes
before
she wears them- ends up picking the ugliest clothes ever;
hates everything she owns; hates the word ‘fisticuffs’,
had
a best friend; nothing special; jumps up and down when
happy; happy with her friends, online and offline; happy
with life

umm, what else? u decide...


needs extensive rewrite. i feel that i am vain....

Adrian is a loser. Adrian has got no sense of humor. Adrian laughs like a hyena. Adrian..umm, okay. This sucks. I've got nothing to write. No, subject matter to discuss folks. I'm just mad. Mad at the world for letting me stay here, mad at my seatmate in sociology. I don't have a seatmate. Mad, at every pathetic loser who come up to me every single day, not knowing I am mad. Okay, I've got nothing more to ramble about. Maybe, I'll just get a latte and everything will eventually be okay.

Adrian is still a loser.

hmmm...128 friends on the friendster list. not bad. the question is, do i know them know them. some. i guess it's just mean not to add people that ask, right? sigh. here i am, on a given sunday, being a bum, in front of a pc. granted, i still feel like i do not have a life or something to smile about.

sigh. there's nothing much to kwento...get me a venti frapp and i'll be hyperly induce you with my endless psychobabble. get me a bacardi, i'll prolly end up telling you my life's sob story. that's me. upfront and real.

so, here i am, back at school. back at the droning room. i've got no classes this afternoon so i've taken this time and opportunity to answer these dumb surveys on my friendster bulletin board. yea, if they're so dumb, why answer them. simple. because i'm bored and i've got nothing else to do so there...granted i have lots of major nursing subjects, i can't even go to the beach! daym! life just really sucks. bigtime.


Message: LAYER 0NE:
-- Name: Nicole Aleja Reyes Maramo
-- Birth date: September 21,1986
-- Birthplace: philippines
-- Current Location: manila
-- Eye Color: brown
-- Hair Color: black
-- Righty or Lefty: lefty
-- Zodiac Sign: virgo

LAYER TWO:
-- The shoes you wore today: somethin' else
(school shoes)
-- Your weakness: beach, i'd die if i'd go to the
beach
-- Your fears: sadako..heheh..dorm ghosts/'the
incubus'
-- Your perfect pizza: losta cheese and pepperoni

LAYER THREE:
-- Your thoughts first waking up: *school* *ugh*
-- Your best physical feature: lips..daw..
-- Your bedtime: 12am. insomniac
-- Your most missed memory: summertime in
abudhabi. christmastime in abu dhabi. back to
school in abudhabi...everything about abudhabi
(city near dubai..not to be confused with
saudi/ksa)

LAYER FOUR:
-- In love?: uhuh

LAYER FIVE:
-- Smoke: umm...sorta
-- Sing: in the showers..
-- Take a shower everyday: lotsa times
-- Have a crush: a million
-- Do you think you've been in love: just once
-- want to go to college: yea..somewhere else

-- Like(d) high school: totally
-- Want to get married: depends..don't we all?
-- Believe in yourself: sometimes.
-- Get motion sickness: never
-- Think you're attractive: no
-- Think youre a health freak? sometimes
-- get along with your parent(s): sometimes..hehe
-- Like thunderstorms: like music to my ears..i
love the rain. :)
-- Play an instrument: i play the 'kahon'..haha
joke..guitar, piano..noseflute..heheh..i wanna
play the sax..

LAYER SIX:
In the past month...
-- drank alcohol: yea
-- Smoked: uhuh
-- Done a drug: no
-- Made Out: lips are sealed. no. haha.
-- Gone on a date: yea
- Gone to the mall? duh.
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: Yea! dipped them
all in crumpy
-- Eaten sushi: uhuh
-- Been on stage: yea. that higher platform in
the classroom
-- Been dumped: nada
-- Gone skating: no

LAYER SEVEN:

Ever...
-- Played a game that required removal of
clothing: yea. i think. b4..heheh.
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: i think
so. can't remember
-- been caught "doing something": hahaha..it
depends..
-- Been called a tease: next question.
-- Gotten beaten up: nah
-- Shoplifted: no
-- Changed who you were to fit in: nope.never.
i'm a bum and will always be one..

LAYER EIGHT:
-- Age you hope to be married: 23
-- Numbers and Names of Children: 5 or 6
gaia, martin, farrah or some exotic, name..
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: wedding on the
beach
-- How do you want to die: stupid question. next.
-- Where do you want to go to college: harvard
school of law or UCLA
-- What do you want to be when you grow
up: *sings* i wanna be a supamodel..heheh..nah..i
want to be a flight attendant..:)

LAYER NINE:
In a guy/girl..
-- Best eye color? blue/green...whatever
-- Best hair color? blonde/black
-- Short or long hair: short.clean
-- Height: 6 flat.
-- Best weight: any.
-- Best articles of clothing: oxford shirts
-- Best first date location: beach
-- best first kiss location: neck. joke..no idea

LAYER TEN:
-- # of drugs taken illegally: nada. you wish i
did.
-- # of people I could trust with my life: 500
-- # of CDs that I own: 10 (best cds)
-- # of tattoos: nada.nil.
-- # of things in my past that I regret: a million
-- # of cigarettes you smoke in a day: ....
-- # of times you get horny in a day: :z

I am a sad friendster person.I am just as sad as your are...fine, ignore me..
This is sooo not the day to rant....

Why oh why is everyone addicted to friendster? They might as well call it 'stalkster' because of the people actually wanting to know who's who and whichever. The idea there is to collect friends, not make them. Sigh. I know I'm being a hypocrite, but then again, I don't think having a lot of friends in my friendster list will make me feel accomplished. Granted, I'm still a loser. I am currently hooked up to it because of my friends forcing me to make a really touchy, hallmark card-ish testimonials for them..hehehe, you know who you are ;) I've been spending countless hours sitting in a net cafe for this. Double sigh. I know I'm not making sense these days, as always.

Since I'm in my Carrie Bradshaw mood, I'd spill on the 'stimultating' details of my life, in the city. Minus the sex. I am currently contemplating on which book to read and what to have for dinner. Honestly, RP is starting to bore me. Ugh. I'd probably order Chinese in a while. At least pigging out later won't make my weekend so bad. There's more to life than friendster. Believe me, once you get caught up, there's no one stopping you.

Ha, New blog. For my alter ego. She wishes to express herself. Intellectuals, beware. It's a bizarre rollercoaster of emotions engulfing her. Lol. Liyam told me I like to refer to myself as the third person. Haha, so true. Like Tarzan. Nicole wants to eat. Nicole wishes she can kick ass. Nicole will end up reading a 500 page novel the whole night. Yada,yada,yada. Nicole will be a lazy bum for the rest of the sem break. Scratch that, a lazy beach bum. There. I said it.




www.geekgirlgoddess.blogspot.com

Back. Yes, still alive but not kicking. Being seventeen doesn't make me feel old. Wouldn't it be much cooler if I had gotten a driver's license and a car. Sigh. The world would be a better place to live in if Nicole Maramo had a car...and some gas money. I have to be patient. Gah.

I feel sick, I look sick and I am sick... Our semestral break is finally here. After all those intensive nights of cramming in the study hall with an 'incubus' around bothering you at 3 in the morning. Well, almost, because we were all forced to attent this stupid CPR and First Aid training for 5 goddamn days. Can be pretty nerve-racking. That's a day in a life of a pre-med student for you. With any luck, I might make it to our capping. *Drums fingers* I'm getting this awful migraine. Well, given any day these past few weeks, I feel seriously stressed-out and tired. Maybe now is the perfect time time to unwind...I'll probably crash at Angel's house and watch Bush's Air Force One land on T.V...I swear, CNN can be pretty addictive with couch potatoes like me...

I've got a great idea..why not demote my status from being a couch potato to a beach bum..Boracay, anyone?