the brits have invaded new york

Blimey. The Kate Moss for Topshop collection have pieces on sale at Barneys New York. How very delightful. I totally love the Brit store ever since I was thirteen, when its sister shop, Miss Selfridge opened in the Middle east. I would always take my mum to go shop there, even if she insisted on taking me to uber-bland Marks & Spencer. Don't get me wrong, their hand creams are so much nicer than American-based Victoria's secret and I adore their chocolate-covered Digestive cookies. So yeah, they have Miss Selfridge a couple of years back and well, wouldn't you know, they opened a Topshop store in Manila as well! Before I left for the states, I've stocked up on a lot of Topshop basics. Too bad they haven't opened here-well, not yet but soon.

Back, to the Kate Moss for Topshop collection. She epitomizes the alternative fusion of the casual-meets-catwalk fashion. My goodness, she could wear a bra over her head and people would be raving about it the next day. Erm, maybe not. Her designs are practical- not too frilly, not quite girly, with a bit of rock n' roll (as influenced by her on and off boyfriend Pete Doherty, methinks). We could see a lot of groupie-inspired fashion in fall's runway. Think Alexander McQueen and the 'rebel without a cause take on his designs'. Oooh, and who could forget the talented Ms. Luella Bartley for her famous Luella for Target line. I wish I had gotten myself one of her cute, little, long-chained tin purses. That was barely a year ago. And the t-shirt trend I have been seeing reproduced everywhere is from the Henry Holland's House of Holland collection, with Agyness Deyn as his muse/collaboration partner. The vibrant and funky colors and outrageous sayings on the t-shirts (Flick yer beans for Agyness Deyn..err, huh?) are amusing, really.

Speaking of t-shirts, I have yet to finish Island Tribe's collection and I'm several shirts behind. I took time-off from designing to focus on my cute little Ava, who now babbles incessantly. Message me, if you would like to buy shirts or go here.

when niki gets mad

I am frustrated. Very. It is just the little things that he does which ticks me. I have explained for the nth time why he just really drives me crazy. And after a litany of explanations, he has the guts to ask why. Why? I'll tell you why, you imbecilic moron. You so do not get it. I am very easy to talk to, but if you piss me off, I'll go nuclear on your ass. I took all the patience I have to pinpoint his mistakes, or well, shortcomings so that he would be aware of those, but noooooo- he has the decency to bring up stuff that are wayyyy out of the topic. Gah, I feel like I am talking to a 2-year-old. You are soooo ruining my day/night. Bleh.

passive self-expression

why is he like that?
he rarely talks whenever we speak
& he almost never talks about anything-
plus he would rather not talk about "it" at all.
why, oh why am i like this?
it has been 3 days. three days.

mary poppins, minus the umbrella

jf0x says:
dude
NicoLeY says:
ano
jf0x says:
i just got diagnosed with "general anxiety"
jf0x says:
pucha pare
NicoLeY says:
baket
jf0x says:
i'm a few heartbeats away from being prescribed with prozac
NicoLeY says:
nipapansen mo lang ako kapag tinetherapize kita
NicoLeY says:
hahah
jf0x says:
i was feeling crap all week
jf0x says:
i have no idea
jf0x says:
but i feel like sht
jf0x says:
tired
jf0x says:
chest pains
jf0x says:
difficulty breathing
jf0x says:
man
jf0x says:
awww
jf0x says:
am i that twisted already?
NicoLeY says:
lol, nagddrugs ka ba?

I know. What an ungodly thing to say to a guy whom I have been giving mini-therapy sessions for what seem like ages now. Tinetherapize. Haha, is there such a word or did I just cleverly, spur-of-the-momently spit it out. It is funny though, how I try to create my own nikilingo or nikibabble, since sometimes I really do suck at speaking Tagalog so I make up new words as I go along. I'm sure Nyebs is going to be okay. For $50 dollars an hour to a total of $ 1500 per session, who wouldn't be?? Haha, I'm kidding Nyebs. I still think you look like Silas, the albino monk.

I am still getting used to this blogger by night, mommy by day routine. The idea of being a mum
still baffles me at times because everytime I would wake up in the morning, I feel like everything has been a dream. And then I'd literally slap myself awake and look beside me. Oh my, I have an adorable kid with big brown eyes, smiling at me. Charlotte wakes me up in the wee hours of the morning just so she could have her milky. Oh man, I've been getting used to babyspeak for three months now. From the choreographed monkey dances to the well-rehearsed lullabies,I am a one woman show. She has songs for whenever she gets her diaper changed, the poopie time song with a verse that goes, "Charlotte goes poopie time, let's change her diapie", to her bath time song, "Charlotte, Washy, washy". Who could forget her famous "No More Light" video on Youtube which my friend Lyka never gets tired of watching. Trust me, it could get addictive, like the Bloouh baby.

So yeah, that's me being domesticated. I mean I still do have free time for myself, I could always use a little R&R from time to time. That's why I hung out with my BFF Bea the whole day today. I missed her so she came over and we started googling our party dresses with the googleizer. We're throwing this huuuuge birthday bash for her twenty-first and we're both excited about it. Lol, if we couldn't work out the whole nursing career thing, we'll probably end up being party planners or whatever. It is fun to organize an event once in a while.

Time to hit the sack.
Like I would normally say after a burst of pent up emotion
and nonsensical rambling about my day-
TTFN- like the British would say.

Niki attempts to blog again.

At three in the morning, energy drink-induced feeling completely and utterly awake, ( not with the wide-eyed stare Charlotte usually gives me in the morning, I swear that kid has the biggest, googly eyes ever) I finally get back into blogging again, after a year-long hiatus. It's funny how blogging can suddenly turn into an addiction once you know people read your blog, even though it seems like you are talking to yourself and sounding like a complete imbecile. I was actually amusing myself catching up with some celebrity gossip, snooping around celebrity blogs, bloggers and whatnot. Hay, the drama of hollywood & at the height of drama still, these people can manage to look gorgeous from head to toe. Talk about Paris Hilton and her unruly extensions.

I lot has happened the whole year I was on blogger AWOL. I was a workaholic at one point, a tanorexic emo-kid wannabe, a shopaholic splurging on purses and shoes, an on-the-go event coordinator (black&white, anyone?) & the unexpected job of all which I did not regret and am still learning a few tricks of the trade- being a mommy. It can be hectic at times, from the up-all-night marathons to the accidental spit-ups. Ava, charlotte-ing, noelley, or whatever we call her, she's three months old today. And I am just loving every second of this mommy job.

As far as this blog is concerned, I'll still be here, chronologically writing random thoughts, muses and writings for everyone to take pleasure on reading. Be sure to check updates, pictures and more of Charlotte's videos. Cheerio

Ease the gut feeling

I don't think I have any reason to be sad about. It's just that nothing makes me happy anymore. I have absolutely no idea what is going on with me whatsoever. Maybe it's the chemical imbalance in my head, or I might be bipolar. One minute I'm okay, the next, I would confine myself in my own space and just be passive. Most people know about my case, my ex (it feels weird calling him this, when all the time I would be like, my boyfriend is this and that) does. He used to make me feel so happy and contented with life. But know I don't know what I want anymore. I'm afraid to let him go, although all the while I know that I've done that the moment we broke up. I should be depressed, I know I am. It's just that sometimes I don't really feel anything. I would do all the messed up things in the world. Sit and cry and be emo-fied. That's it.

Not only that. My dad is my problem. My problem is my dad. I am so sick of it. I am so sick of the watchful eyes and the strictness. Sometimes I am so mad at him I wanna chop my hand off, ala Saw II. I know a lot of people care about me but I just can't help being this way. It is probably because everything in Manila happened so fast. With my cousin, my titas and titos. Oh God. I so do not want to remember that. Escaping to California was haven. I thought I wouldn't have any problems when I get here. But I'm wrong.

Some things can't be helped. I just need to hold on. And not be stupid.
Because sometimes I can do stupid stuff.
I know I am aware of those.

Stupid Girl

I am the most stupid girl in the entire planet
I know people will hate me for what I did
Yes, I broke up with my boyfriend
I dunno
I just want to detatch myself from everyone who
attempted to love me
That shows how stupid I am
I hurt people
And I am upset about it

It fucking sucks to be me.

Hassle, chong

Haaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy nako. I thought I was going to pass my midterms last week, tapos I found out last night through my professor's site that it was due tomorrow! So I spent last night working on my take home midterm examination for HIST B17 (American History), which includes a bunch of psychobabble questions I do not understand tapos edi I started cramming all my knowledge into the essays and stuff and I e-mailed my prof. After 7 cups of Reese's, a cup of java and a plate load of cookies, I was done. I had to wake up at 7 so I think I slept at around 3 even if I still wasn't sleepy. I kinda woke up late so I had to get dressed ( Blue flowered shirt because me and Kevin planned to go to school with the same shirt), and be out by like 9 so that I still would be able to type and print my essays in school. Finally got to school at aorund 9:45 thenstarted scanning for an empty booth to type on (heck there was a lot of people here), then finally, after a million years of booting up the pc started to work so I checked my mail----- to my surprise my professor e-mailed me back na the due date was not till next week! I'm like oh man! Pero at least I'm already done with it.

Pshaw.
So I basically have one more hour to kill.
Later yo.

Space to breathe

Please set new blog links to http://nikidarling.blogspot.com/
I don't want pestering dads or relatives snooping through what remains as my semi-private outlet for all my pent-up emotions.

Just a phase

At last I am fully recovering from my blogger's block and back from a really long hiatus. School just started for me and it made me pretty busy for a while. I even got a job on the weekends too. I don't consider answering phones and jotting down appointments a tough task to do but it keeps me preoccupied on Saturdays.

I went to a highschool party after work last Saturday. It was my friend Lovell's sister Michelle's sweet sixteen. They had a dj and everything from strobe lights to ipod docks and a thousand songs. But of course most of the people came were kids so it was pretty awkward to mingle with the sixteen something crowd. Gosh, it made me feel really old considering that I'm turning twenty this year. Twenteen could be an understatement but what the hell, I want to enjoy my last few years as a teenage internet junkie. Still the party was much fun because some of the people from school were there. I was gonna go clubbing in L.A. with my cousin and some friends but yeah, well, my dad didn't want to drive at night. Lol.

I was also asked to be a ninang again. I just went to a baptism like a month ago with Lovell's kid Dylan and now my friends in L.A. want me to be ninang to Krystel's kid Lj. I saw Lj last Sunday and she was soooo cute in her tiny pink dress . She didn't cry much. Awww. I absolutely love kids although sometimes they can be a handful once they reach preschool age. Take it from my experience handling twin boys.

So yeah, I'm at school right now. My last class was American History and I almost got late because of the heavy traffic and it really takes a long time to get to my school like 30 minutes or so. I have a class in another hour and twenty five minutes. Time to hit the library. I am such a nerd.

I'm still thinking about the turning twenty thing. My cousin Ara just turned twenty today. And I kinda felt like reality is sinking into me. I even had this bizarre dream that the number 20 was chasing me, like in the movies where a huge monstrous ape is chasing you only its a 20. TWENTY. Hahaha. I am gonna stop scaring myself. Maybe turning twenty won't be so bad.

The theory of sad little girls

I was a sad little girl growing up. I thought I could always get what I want. Clothes, shoes, everything. Sometimes when I'd feel like everyone has turned me down, or the world is laughing in front of my face, I'd lock myself in the bathroom and cry. Cry 'till my heart aches and until I realize that life goes on. This was me, then and this is still me now. I always have this perception that when you make a bad impression, it is always what people will think of you, no matter how much you change in the future, take ten or twenty years when you don a successful career and you strive hard to become the beautiful self you were dreaming of when you were a little girl. You will still be that same sad person you once were. And there's no hiding it.

Now, I think I'm more mellow about it, sometimes when people think otherwise that I'm such a person, I'm like fuck it, I don't give a damn. Other times I would sit in my room and contemplate. I would even ask my dad, as a young girl, "Daddy, what is wrong with me?", and my dad would tell me that I am his perfect little angel. Dads overexaggerate sometimes. That's why when you turn twenty and you are an only girl, he still would not let you go.

I will have to face the consequences of being an epitome of perfection. No matter what I do, no matter where I go, I will always be daddy's little girl. And there's no escaping it.

Revelations Circa 2005

This helluva rollercoaster year is about to end. And a new year is about to start. I know I am lame with introductions, straight to the point answers, blog topics, random musings and everything else. I later realize that people like me, having not much of a social life, shouldn't be writing a blog. I will most probably write something worth reading in the future- live a novelization of this blog. Haha. Who am I kidding?

So now I'll just have to sum up 3 months worth of updating about my gung-ho farm life (which in case if you guys weren't tuned in with my big move from my awesome-yet-simple life in Manila, to my delusional and endless pigging out on smoregasboreds in Abu Dhabi all the way to a huge leap in SoCal) digitally inked within the confinement of this screen:

01. I now live in Bakersfield, CA. Yes, it is near the mountains. And yes, there is lifeform on this side of California.
02. I quit school for which had seemed like eons due to the delay of necessary status changes, and hopefully, keeping my fingers crossed, I will continue nurturing my intellect next Spring.
03. I'm only online to check my mail, two of my friendster and myspace accounts and if I get lucky, chat with friends I haven't heard from for the longest time. I will be getting a computer soon, and DSL, and everything that needs to be setup in order for my "business in web development" to run. These are all eventually being planned as I type and will be further released...pronto.
04. I am currently learning how to drive and I hope to pass my driver's license practicals so that I could get my Cali license. And as for the wheels to drive, I still have no idea. I am not a car person so I couldn't care less which car to drive as long as it isn't super ancient and I would have to get a multi-colored seatcover for it. My friend Roxy owns a Mustang and I'm thinking of getting one as well.
05. The weather is so friggin' cold here and it isn't what I've expected it to be. I'm hella freezing my anorexic bones here. So after Thanksgiving my family and I went shopping for thermal coats, mittens and boots. I got the ones with fur to warm my toes. It gave new meaning to "shopping as a necessity"
06. Yes, Kiwi and I are still together. We love each other. Period. I know it won't be a merry Christmas for the both of us but I think we should give ourselves pats in the back for keeping cool about this whole LDR ordeal. I hate it so much. But I'd rather do productive stuff than dwell about it.
07. I was saddened by the fact that I left a lot of stuff in 'Pinas. Memories, friends, unfinished business, clothes, bags and a whole lot of other bullcrap. People I will miss and others I have completely erased from my life. People I countlessly shed tears for and people who will never know and understand me. Oh yeah and people who don't miss me aren't excempted. It sucks if you're not missed.
07. And as for my friends who read my blog, check in from time to time, you know who you are. Thanks for making me a part of your lives even though my life isn't as glamorous as a movie star's. But hey, not everyone can have their own reality show. So I might as well type away. I've always objected writing into these kind of things but I started blogging as early as 14 and I can't help myself.

For now, after this whole entry has been published I am not sure if I would post as regularly as I hope I would. So this is a temporary goodbye until I get my life back on track. TTFN* as the British say.
*ta-ta for now


Hiatus starts now.

Everything's Eventual

After a three-week load of stuffing myself with In-and-Out fries and gulping down Razz Iced tea and cruising around places like Pasadena and the Marketplace, oh and a couple of episodes of Laguna Beach where Jason breaks up with Jessica for Alex, I am finally getting back into this thing called "blogging". Yes, I know I haven't been chronicling my life for a while. It's been weeks of craziness and twisted humor from my dad, my brothers and new found friends here in Southern Cali where I'm currently staying until I move to this hick town called Bakersfield, CA. Population, nil? I might be exaggerating but I really do not feel like moving wayyy over there. Plus, I still haven't taken my driver's license exam thingy and I am way jealous of my cousin Ara, who got her license through mail yesterday. She still needs to get her insurance in order to drive though. I cannot wait to drive.

In a couple of days I am turning nineteen and anticipating for it is like waiting forever. My mom suggested that we all go to Six Flags for the bash, since it's me, my brother Gerard's, who turns thirteen going on seven and my cousin Adrian's birthday as well. So it'll be a three-in-one which I don't really mind but I also wanted a little get together with my friends here. And as for school, I applied at Pasadena City College but I didn't get in though because I lack necessary papers and stuff so I'm gonna have to try Cal State Bakersfield if I would get accepted this fall. If not, then there's always the winter term which starts in January. I hope they credit my units though or I'll have to start from scratch.

I am currently hooked-up with My Space. Yeah, I know it's kinda late to hear that because I think it's already outdated but so what. It's pretty addictive and it's like friendster all over again. I'll probably get back into webdesigning (how many times have you guys heard this from me??) and learn how to play drums until I get back to school. People are asking about how me and Kiwi are doing now that we are into this whole LDR thing. I think we're cool. The past few weeks had been hell for us. It's hard to adjust and compromise, I must admit. But nevertheless, I know everything will work out for the best. I still miss everyone I left in Phil., but the thing is I've got my own life to live and I have to make the best of it. Gino is planning on coming next summer if not this December so I probably would be driving. Coolness.

And as for everything else, I know this won't be my last entry, I promise.

T.V., Interdependence & A Whole Lot of Concerts

make poverty history.

Daddy's girl

It's hard raising kids. What's more hard is raising a mom and a dad. Kids, will always be kids, but they will soon realize what they are going through right now is more like a phase in their lives that they would overcome. On the other hand, parents will be parents, regardless of them being open-minded. I know they would worry a whole lot, because you're miles and miles away from them. But if I could just get across the barriers and talk to my folks, and they would actually listen instead of being these judgemental-types, I wouldn't be too hard on myself.

Yesterday, my dad turned 50. I was so excited to call him and tell him that I could not wait to come home and us being a complete family again. So anyway, I talked to him and I knew that he had been reading my blog. Heck, I was just a normal eighteen year old typing away my rants about how my day went, yet, he feels disappointed in me. I felt really bad about that. Made me feel really low and pathetic. I don't take a crap from anyone, not even a close relative, but when I listen to my dad and him saying all these things, I feel like the lowest creature known to mankind. I love my dad so much and I respect him a lot. I know he knows what is best for me, but sometimes I feel worried, that when the time comes that he needs to let me go, he would not let me. I'll always be Daddy's girl.

I am sorry for being an eighteen year old teenager,wanting to graduate to make my parents feel proud of me.That's all I ever wanted, it's just that certain circumstances made them think otherwise that it was because of certain persons involved.

This is just me.
And I am sorry for spilling my guts here.
I am in sheer desperadoes.

Sinong konyo ngayon?

Entry ko dapat kahapon. Blogger was down yesterday.
Ayos yung party kahapon. Salamat sa mga dumalo. hehehe.

Today is Kiwi and Niki Day…oh wait, that was yesterday.Woke up feeling stress-free. For once I wasn’t thinking too much about my departure. Currently listening to Filter’s Take a picture. I really loved that song. Makes me feel worry-free and not so stressed-out about moving. I seriously need to get rid of a lot of stuff cluttered around my room so I could start packing. With any luck, I hope to get delayed for a month.

Yesterday saw too much of me hanging out. I mean really hang out. And pig-out. I went to school early morning yesterday to meet up with Lea and a bunch of other people I know because they were having their return demo for scrubbing and gowning or so I heard. This was in preparation for their duty at the OR (operating room). Too bad I wasn’t going to join them this summer. I wasn’t able to meet up with Lea though because me and Kiw had to go to Benilde for him to see his thesis adviser. His defense went well last Wednesday, he rushed to the house, still in his corporate attire, just to tell me the good news. I was glad that he was going to graduate by December. So I waited for him at Starbuck’s Taft and ordered a coffee-based caramel frappucino. Kiw doesn’t really get why I had to put brown sugar on my frapp when its obviously too sweet. I explained that I liked the crunchy sensation when biting those brown sugar bits. He just laughed and started teasing me because I easily get pikon when he teases me to my ex-addiction to Spongecola. He would croon Yael-like the whole drive to BF. Ack, it is really annoying.

I love Kiw to pieces, because he organized this despedida party for me tonight at his place and a lot of people were coming, mostly our friends, and people I met through him (Sorry if I wasn’t able to inform or invite people because I wasn’t the one who planned the whole thing). Now normally Gino would hang out with us at BF but the was too busy with school because his finals are coming up.

I think my flight is going to be delayed for about another week because my residency visa for Abu Dhabi isn’t processed yet. I wonder what Kiw’s plans are gonna be for our thing on the 15th. The last time we had a semi-romantic dinner was at the Alabang country club with Gino and Rash..heheh. Although it wasn’t the two of us, but we still had a pretty terrific time.

So anyway, back to yesterday’s events, while we were cruising on skyway while listening to John Mayer.We had shawarmas at President’s Ave. sa BF and the shawarmas here are half as good as the ones in Abu Dhabi. Lebanese shawarmas are fantastic. After getting ourselves stuffed we were supposed to go to Ruins to buy DVDs but we didn’t have much time because we were supposed to buy groceries for the refrigerator cake we were going to make so we opted for town to buy some stuff. We met up with Mico and his friend Luigi instead and hung out at Starbuck’s (again). It was really nice hanging out with Mico again because we haven’t seen him since we all went to Tj’s with Welo. He’s super kulit and super fun to be with. Luigi was nice too, as opposed to other celebrity kids who are superficial. He looked so much like his dad. After eating oreo cheesecake and another venti mocha frapp, we all went to Petron at Westgate then had to leave because like any normal kids I had a curfew so Kiw brought me home.

I am so going to miss coffeetime-slash-killingtime at town. And the fact that cheesedogs are only 10 bucks (peso bucks). Oh, and everytime we pass by Stoked inc, the wakeboarding store I always wanted to buy my own board & fixtures and a lovely new pair of havaianas which my brother termed as expensive tsinelas. Tapos when it’s Kiwi’s turn to go to his shop he’d always look for a gi, which was practically the same gi he’d been going back to for months. I hope they have those jiu jitsu gis in the States though. And our Jamaican patties food trip. I think De’ Original is yummier than Royal Carribean. Still, I can’t like the uber hot patties Kiw is ordering.

Gah, so much kwento, so little time. Today I’m off to buy groceries because we weren’t able to buy them last night. I hope I still remembered what Kitkat told me about those graham cakes. John is going to Boracay today. Hope you have a blast cuz!

More drama later.

Censorship

Earlier I got a YM message from my cousin that my titas saw my "raunchy" pic on friendster. I did not really understand what the fuss is all about. The tiny pic was blurry, and it was actually a decent pic, it didn't show a lot though, just my legs and I was in a swimsuit because, uh, duh, I went swimming or was trying to get a tan under the californian sun. I thought the photo was artsy regardless of what they think. Saka I myself would not post it if its too ma-halay.I don't get the culture here, I mean it's just one measly pic and it could definitely not harm anyone. If they are really upset about this, being grown-ups and all, with kids of their own, they could probably have told me that they were upset about it. Geez, I mean, my mom was also wearing skimpy bathingsuit when she was like my age or maybe even younger.

Model used in this blog are for illustrative purposes only; Nicole does not suggest that the model is actually engaged in the conduct duscussed in this story that she illustrates

Double sigh. Why is it that everytime I try to do something normal, it ends up blowing up in front of me. It's bad enough that they frown upon everything that I try to do including having a boyfriend. Is it completely wrong to make mistakes? I think everyone deserves a right to be screwed up. Because they will not learn if they're too perfect to complicate things.

Things like these need to come around. The next time I'll be basking under the californian sun, I'll make sure to bring a sweater- a really bulky one.

Getting messed up

Two days. I know, I gotta make this all quick.We were at Eastwood last Saturday night to celebrate a double birthday bash at Jack's Loft ( Mai's fave). Kiwi, Gino, and I were the first among the few who arrived and Avi, Joyce and their room mate Belle were there and it was like the three Abu Dhabi schools clashing and all. Fun. There are tons of people at Libis because of some benefit concert thing featuring Mojofly so the whole courtyard was packed. Typical scenario of guys and girls ogling at each other. Damn, I'm gonna miss this.

I didn't know that there was Gweilo's at Eastwood, because apparently Spongecola and their testosterone band were gonna play according to Joyce, who was the band's self-appointed groupie. Heheheh. So we went to Gweilo's to watch them play. There were other asteg bands playing as well kaya un, I stayed while Kiwi & co. were like waiting pa pala because they wanted to go to Blue Onion. I didn't even felt like dancing because I wasn't in the mood and all. And then it started. It pertaining to me and Kiwi's huge argument that lasted for hours. I know I can be bitchy at times. Maybe it was because I was leaving for good. Suddenly, I don't feel like writing anymore...

Some days you just can't figure out

Today is April 2. A day too late past the pranks being done and pranks that have gone to waste. Since we missed the Avril Lavigne et Simple Plan concert ( which, thank God we DID miss because there were lots of weird people hanging around, throwing cans and stuff and climbing on fences or so I heard) I told my brother than Avril was going to play at Eastwood yesterday. He got all excited all day and asked me to get dressed to we'd be there extra early.He fell for it. Heheh. Well, some people like Kiwi for instance, are aware of April Fools' Day, so some of my acting skills backfired. I told him I wasn't leaving and he didn't believe me.Plus, I was sick, I had the flu so my voice sounds hoarse. I think I'm feeling better today, I got my voice back. Swell.

Well most people would probably think death and accidents are pretty funny. I don't think it is. Normally when somebody tells me that I would freak out and panic in hysteria and eventually cry, so I think it's a low-blow joke when somebody tries to scare me off like that. It's a good think nobody tried to pull that prank on me.

But they did however played a prank on my guy friend, which wasn't very nice either. I think it's somewhere between the lines of insanity and being a sicko-stalker for some reason. What is it with people who are pretending to be someone that they're not? I do not mean trying to be Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan for that matter. Actually masquerading as a completely different characted invented just to lure a guy into believing that that person really does exist. My God, it happened three times. When is it going to stop, huh? I'll elaborate more on this when I post my next entry. I feel bad not knowing this sooner. I hope my friend's okay now.

So there. That wraps up my April Fools' Day celebration. I actually have three friends celebrating their birthday yesterday, Jomarie, Avi and Daivy. I remembered when I was back home in Abu Dhabi, they all had parties on the same day so I really had to pick, but I ended up not going to any of their parties. That really sucked. Heheh. Oh well, Happy birthday you guys. I'll be seeing Jomarie and Avi later tonight because we'll be having dinner at Jack's Loft at around eightish. Ladeeda.

Gotta get ready by O' eight hundred hours
Ttfn :)

The things I’ll miss the most

This was unexpected, really. Here I am, almost at my third year at St. Paul, expecting my duties at the OR and DR for the whole summer- till I found out that I’ll be going to Abu Dhabi for a couple of months, then California to study. I don’t really know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. Or worse.

Sure I did have one of the best times here in the Philippines, I discovered a whole lot of unfathomable meaning in my life. I’ve learned the importance of being thrifty and conditioned myself for the hassles of traffic, baha, and the works. I did have my fun night outs, tambays where my friends and I share uncontrollable laughter over a single bottle of San Mig Light (who can blame me, I am almost nineteen).Kagulo. Hehehe. Or at school.

Walking along the hallways of the school decked in my checkered uniform and my uber
high-heeled school shoes and smiling at the familiar faces that pass by isn’t exactly an ideal memory, but heck it was one I’d wish to keep. I still wished that I had stayed but like I have read somewhere, “life is constant and ever changing”.

I’m surely going to miss my cousins, my relatives and the works. They gave me a whole lot of support and concern. I’m going to miss my friends, old and new, retarded or not..heheh..People that have become a part of my mere existence.

My brother Gino. Yes, who could not forget him? He’s like my big brother and we always hangout over the weekends. We have this I’ll-buy-you-a-frapp-then-you-buy-me-next-week thing. It’s really nice. We never really got to watch gigs together.

My cousin Johnnnyboy. Yeah, you. Hehehe. He’s like the closest cousin to me ever. He’s like my older brother when Gino wasn’t around yet. We used to hangout a lot and I’m really glad things are going well with him and Tin. I’m also gonna miss supporting him and his band-well, I’m gonna miss the band as well. Saiphra. You know they’re awfully talented and they should be famous. I’m gonna miss some of the Faura people I know too. Maybe I should post another entry that’ll be like a remember-when-this-happened. Maybe. Soon.

There are quite a lot of good memories at St. Paul, like when we were at the dorm during freshman year, I was having a lot of fun with my room mates, stealing their clothes at the bathroom so they’d actually have to run out naked, or watching pirated school scandal DVDs that made all the other girls from the other rooms gather around in front of a laptop to curiously watch and giggle. There’s also the time when we watched the NU Rock Awards and the Incubus concert and how me and Angel were so psyched to see it and not stop constantly talking about it.

I’m surely gonna miss my blockmates, since I got resectioned from D to A, life has never been the same. Like the time we all had to practice late at Mars’s dorm for our big production. And the time all our classmates supported us at our cheering competition, who mostly stayed up late just to finish doing the pompoms. I’m gonna miss a bunch of teachers as well, the teachers who gave inspiration to my studying, even though I try so hard to like the subjects, these people kept me going and laughing at the same time. Who could forget the extraordinary Jenlao? We go to the duties together with the group, well, I’m going to miss the group as well. It was darn fun at Enchanted Kingdom, especially when we had paintball extremes at rode the rollercoaster.

I’m also gonna miss the loving Barx, you know who you are…well specifically Caila, Lea, Tine, Noh, Marc, Bea and Gail. They’re also my group mates during the Defense. You guys helped me out during the really bad times and we also had our good times hanging out. I am very grateful and I will miss you guys a whole lot. And our food trips in front of the school, eating mangga, kikiyam and fishball. Oh and our ice cream fests as well. Sigh.

The thing or the person I’ll miss the most would be the person who was always there for me. The person who’s super feeling because he thinks he’s always the topic of my blog and all. The person who never fails to make me laugh even with this corniest jokes and his peculiar laughter. The person who convinced me that the world does revolve around me and even surprised me with a hundred flat tops scattered in his pick-up. The person who doesn’t care if I have raging hormones and mood swings.The person I fell for.

That is you.
Kiwi